Who am I?

I want to find God inside me, in the world. I want to heal women, to heal girls, to love exuberantly. I want to melt the barriers of fear between women and their bodies. I want women to see the beauty that shines. 

Well more than that, I’m a student finishing her degree. I grew up privileged and white, I am still privileged and white. The big scary questions always got me, “why am I here?” or “what’s the point?” My routes in search of answers have lead me through all the usual routes of trying to fit in (be cool!) to critical social theory (its the man! its the white man!) to spirituality. I’m now in the process of deepening myself in the traditions of love, acceptance and surrender, while also staying strong in my worldly concerns over the state of women in our western world, and the injustice and -isms that are enacted each day. I’ve had an eating disorder, but what does that mean anymore? Its about as common as breathing for most girls. I’ve starved, I’ve binged, and I find deep meaning and significance in the struggle to control women’s bodies I’m pretty sure I locked myself up in holy ashrams in other lives, this time I’ve got to find peace inside myself and heal while in the world. Its not just passion, its survival.  

Oh, and I hardly proof read. This is my blog to be messy and unorganized.

Most of my thought is not original, that is to say, it comes from the theory and writings of many others.  This isn’t unique, it happens all the time within movements, its important to share and learn from each other. I must acknowledge that my opinions and rantings are highly influenced by other women, especially Women of Color. I didn’t come up with this framework and modes of understanding, they did. There’s a long history of white women marginalizing Women of Color in the “women’s movement” so let’s just be aware of that as we move forward.